When Should You Talk About Your Divorce with Others?

FizzNiche May 1, 2012 0
When Should You Talk About Your Divorce with Others?

When going through troubles in your marriage it’s hard to know what you can share with others.  We often wonder when is the right time to tell others about your divorce?  What do you say when others ask you why?  You want to be honest with the friends and family in your life, but you don’t want to  face the judgments others can often place on you.

Learn some good advice to follow when talking about divorce.

Be Careful What You Share

When going through difficult times in your relationship, it is often difficult to talk about it with others. The problem becomes when you share TOO much about those difficult times with TOO many different people.

We all need our support groups, our good friends, our confidantes, with whom we can share our deepest thoughts and feelings. We love and trust these people because they don’t typically judge us or our behavior. Too often, I have seem women share their marital problems with a larger crowd … all of who react and form their own opinions and judgments … and then if the couple ever reconciles, those same people can be less tolerant or forgiving about whatever occurred to create the relationship issues.

As much as it is human nature for people to be nosy and want to know the reasons for why a divorce is occurring, I also recommend that women be discreet about sharing too many of those details. Most people don’t need to know any more than a simple statement that says, “We had some issues. Sadly, we are getting a divorce. We would appreciate your respect, your privacy, your support, and your prayers for all of us during this difficult time.” Frankly, most people don’t need to know any more than that!

One final thought, I have also seen “friends” who think they are being supportive when they repeatedly bash the soon-to-be-ex. At some point, this constant negativity keeps you in the swirl of the emotion and hinders your own ability to begin to move forward and heal. Try not to be that friend who lives out the adage that “misery likes company.”

Monique Honaman, Author, The High Road Has Less Traffic, High Road Less Traffic, LLC

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